Yesterday Abbey and I were with her Stars Class at our little beach. It's a nice sand area for the kids to play in next to our huge koi pond. One of the things I love about being a mom is the excuse to just sit and play. Can I just say, I love digging in the sand! We dug through the dry layers and the wet layers and then hit a layer of white sand underneath. The cool feel of the sand brought me back to a childhood memory of digging holes to China. At only an arms length depth we would get so excited thinking that we that we were almost there. Sticking my hand in the sand I had the strangest sensation knowing that it's forty years later and I am on the other side of the hole. I feel a bit like Alice in Wonderland. Looking back over the last five years it seems so surreal. How did I go from feeling I was at such a dead end at 39 with no hope of having a family, to being in the place where all my dreams came true? And how did I go through the dark valley of cancer only to rise again without the slightest harm, just a far greater appreciation for every blessing that comes my way? When I wake up and look at Abbey I just gasp, how did I get this amazingly beautiful creature in my life calling me Mama? Only He could do this - take the smallest, smoldering ember and fan it into a flame. My heart just shouts THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!!!
And thank you to everyone one of you that carried me along the way, I could have never made it without you, and I wouldn't have even tried.
18 comments:
Christi,
My eyes welled up with tears as I read your words. It is amazing when your dreams come true and you are living the dream and stop and realize how truly awesome our Father is to give us exceedingly above all we could ask or think. I feel I am living the dream too with my two girls who overflow my heart with love and joy. What love the Father has given unto us. I am so happy for you and me! I join you in saying, "THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU."
She is such a wonderful blessing! Thanks for sharing!
You are living proof that He works all things together for our good. You have much to be thankful for!
I wish we could dig a whole to China to be there with you!
You are such an amazing Mother and Friend! I love you and hope to share life's lessons and His blessings forever!
Thank you and keep digging to the USA!
Amanda
Christi, can you believe what what the Lord has done to change our lives so profoundly. It is so hard for me to think back to what my life was like before Liliana was here. She is now an amazing, invigorating, funny, extremely bright, and beautiful little girl with a heart of joy. Each time I see Abbey, read your blog, and think about you both, my heart is so full of joy. We both are so blessed. Thank you for being in my life. BTW, I just showed Liliana this post, she immediately said, "Liliana!" (something she says about little girls who are Asian), then she was the blanket. She looked at me questioningly and asked, "What is my blanket doing there?" Too cute. Hugs to you both!
Christi, you are an inspiration to those following behind you. Thank you.
Love the photos of your tiara princess.
I recently came across your blog. I love reading it! You are an amazing woman. I don't know your whole story, but there I think you are certainly blessed. I have 2 daughters from China (and 2 homegrown boys) and everyday I am amazed at how blessed I am to have them call me "Mama." I certainly will join you in thanking Him for these precious miracles.
We are blessed for sure. Enjoy your precious gifts!
I have felt the same way so many times. I'm so happy you and Abbey have found each other too!
Wow, it's been a bit since I could get back to your blog. You're makin' me all teary here. Truly you have been blessed beyond measure and you are in the place you are supposed to be and Dad has his reason for you to be there.
Being a blessing and not a burden is a great feeling and has obviously lifted your spirits.
Teresa
Bless your heart. Dreams do come true!
I just showed Liliana this post and pictures. She looked at them for a second and then said, "that's my blanket! What is it doing there?" She then ran into her room and brought hers out saying, "It's OK mommy, my blanket is right here!" Too cute. We miss you.
Bailey & Liliana :o)
I just love her in this pink outfit with the pink rainboots--such a cool little chickie! She looks like she has grown a few inches--how tall is she now? You are right about your Daddy being such a great guy who knows the end when we only know the beginning and it looks pretty grim and "dead end" but that Dad of ours has much better and greater plans in mind for kids if we just believe in him! It takes some to believe but after a big of a rough start you did it with your Daddy's help and his arms holding you up through it all. I am so grateful to our Daddy for all that he has done for you and Abbey. I also say, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!!!
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